So yesterday I mentioned  that I had some writing to do  about the fan that I  got, gettysburg in general and a few other things, so bear with me its gonna be a bit rambling.

I went and met my folks at gettysburg, every so often we meet up some where to visit since they are about 6 hours away.  Im intrigued by the civil war era, the history, the politics behind what led to the war etc.  I knew that there had been a lot of violence and death there, and while I didnt see any ghosts while i was there i did feel a sense of loss and sadness.  We had taken a bus tour earlier in the day, and that evening we took a “ghost walk” narrated by an author, i believe her name was “spooky” robinson or something like that, he was a really good storyteller and I had fun.  During the walk around town  we stopped here and there,  and at one point we at this dry creek bed, and the narrator said that this was a very violent spot during the civil war, and i felt a need  to touch the granite wall  and in my head i was thinking peace, that whoever was hanging around got what they need to get wherever they needed/wanted to go.  I did feel a bit more peaceful after that, but it was a very sad place for me

On a completely different note, while I was waiting  for the ghost tour to start there was a “general merchandise” store next door  and i was wandering around,turned a corner looked up and saw a fan, not just any fan a pink lacy fan, tottaly not my style, but i got this feeling i *should* buy it, so i did.  And to me its completley perfect for erzulie freda.  I had written last night about missing the fete style rituals Sir and I had been attending and had been reading a book aboutvoodoo/hoodoo, so its not surprizing i got a feeling to get something related to that.  But when i purchased it I felt, well I dont know I guess the word is pretty, girly.  Its something that is hard for me, because sometimes I feel invisible, unloved, but it made me feel better, and the whole weekend I felt like i looked better, my hair turned out ok etc .  I know some of it has to do with self confidence, but ill take what I can get.  I also thought it was interesting that the next day while outlet shopping i found the only rose candle in the sea of of a whole bunch of  candles on clearance , so I going to offer the candle and fan to freda as a thanks for helping me along my jou

Id really like to find a vodoun house that would allow to me watch/participate in a fete