Quiet morning.

We unpacked the altar stuff, sorted, and set up a few. I didnt realize how hard emotionally /energetically it was going to be for me.  Unwrapping everything was like christmas, many of the items i hadnt seen since august.  But as i was handling things i started to get this sad and drained feeling.  When i first started to keep a “real” altar, as in not just a generic pagan one, my ex and i were just starting a relationship, and while the relationship was bad for me, it to brought up those old feelings of noone wanting me, that ill never find some to love and hold me.  Some items i had just lost my connection with them, i looked at an item i had specifically found for a deity and couldnt remember who for quite sometime.  I felt disconnected and very sad.  I think maybe once the setting up is dome i need to spend some time st the meditating and do somethings to reconnect with them.

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