7-14

I got out of the house today and went to the littles munch and I decided to get dressed up and embrace the nice weather I wore a nice sundress did my hair, put makeup on .  I needed the outing being stuck at home, depressed about the job search etc .  there were a shit ton of people there and it was a bit loud at times but I did have fun, wished Mr Del was there but hes off teachin.  Saw C there and she barely talked to me, in a way I suppose that’s a good thing,  but hard as well.  Was sad near the end cause everyone was leavin, it hit me harder than I thought it would .  Went by the fabric store and got the fabric for the new whites shirt.

I didn’t do a shit ton spirituality wise today replenished the salt water for La Sirene spent some time and energy thinking about her and what she means to me, that she  rules over musical arts-which is relative to me cause I love to sing .  I also relate it to finding my voice, as in trying to learn to speak up for myself  more .  She is also said to be able to bring great luck and wealth, but right now even though I could use some luck and money right about now I don’t want to tempt fate or ask too much so that will wait for another day.

I was also reminded of Freya today when I was at the fabric store, I saw an old fashioned cameo brooch (although this one was in plastic) but just this beautiful face with long cascading hair reminded me of her and what she stands for as well-love, it’s a reminder to love myself, even though I feel sad, or not beautiful , cause if I don’t love me than who else will

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