Some goals I have come up with:

1. Take 15 mins each day working on Spirituality.  In addition to doing breathing/centering exercises in the bathroom (Sir’s suggestion), and in the car when Im stressed. I will spend at least 15 mins working on Spirituality, exceptions made for being sick, meetings and travel, work to take the form of meditation or research on spiritual topics, devotional work, journaling, working on altar or devotional items etc

2.  Try take care of my self better-Working on things like trying to fix some sleep issues, downsizing my clutter, getting more organized, working on fixing my teeth and finding a new place, putting myself out there

More goals to come later

Bio-family drama
So I went up to my folks house this past weekend for christmas, I am not out to them about being pagan , or kinky or just about anything, well except my sister knows everything-this is going to change soon but more on that later.

I have to admit as far as material things go I had everything I needed, we were probably what you call upper middle class. Yes I was the odd one, fat, kinda geeky etc, but I survived. As in every family we had our issues, but my family has hidden theirs quite well.  I never untill recently (within the last 2-3 years) knew  that 2  of my immediate family members have mental illnesses and that one has an increasing problem with alcohol.  Wow, that’s big stuff to hide, and I don’t know if its just that during childhood I was having my own issues to deal that I never saw it, or that they hid it really well, I knew the person with the drinking issues drank a decent amount when we were on holiday or at a party, but never really saw it at home .
One of my family members takes meds for their mental illness, and unfortunately is also the one with the increasing problem with alcohol.  I  am concerned for the other persons safety when this person drinks and gets what I would consider borderline verbally abusive.  The person affected has said that if something ever happens they would call the police, but I still talked to them about getting a counselor,and maybe a lawyer, and reiterating they if they every needed to talk then Im just a phone call away.

My  sibling who lives near my folks drinks like a fish at parties and other places so I think she doesn’t see everything.  My mom took care of us, cooked, cleaned took care of the house and worked just as hard as a  “regular” 9-5 job,  and has put up with a lot of  my shit  over the years.  She is wonderful to me, even though at times Im annoyed when they have to talk to me every single blankin Sunday.   Ive had it easy, they have given me a lot of things, but im not sure how much more of the drama and crappy energy that is there every time I go up.  Don’t get me wrong some parts are fun, they took us all to disney and while I would have like to experienced it with chosen family , there were parts that were fun

Eh not sure what to do more later when im more awake